Even though it has been since may that she got the diagnoses, even though I knew in my mommy gut WAY before then...there are still days where it just HITS me all over again. Seems like I am on overload worrying about her development, in her face all the time, doing the therapies, stressing over her not eating and talking...that when all is calm for 5 minutes I start to really thinking. I get that horrible sick feeling that brings me back to the day she was actually diagnosed. Where I felt like I wasn't even in my body anymore.
I know that Ava is progressing and doing better, I am so proud of her. I do think I let it cloud my judgement because when I am around other children, her peers, I can see the big difference.
We went to my sisters house this past weekend, and her cousin is 7 months older than her. She did a lot better with them than before..she would just scream until we took her home. This time she was very interested in their toys. Just not them. She ignores them , acts like they aren't even there. And if i would ask her to hand them something she would totally look away and hand it to them..make every effort not to look at them. Breaks my heart.
But I have to keep on pushing on. I love her with every ounce of my heart. I have bene reading the postive stories, stories of recovery and that is what I am going to focus on.
Also , if anyone has any idea where to buy Autism Lapels in bulk for cheap, please let me know.
I will leave you with some fun park pictures!
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1 comment:
Missy
I so remember feeling this way the entire first year after Gage was diagnosed. It does get easier. They develop (just differently) and the therapies start to be a normal part of life. It gets better honest! Katrina (from BBC)
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